"Lee county Iowa is located closer to the western and southern states, and it is also easier to access for the outer states of Alaska and Hawaii."

That statement was when I could see that this was satire. You're right of course. It would be much faster for a wagon train to reach Alaska from Iowa than from D.C.

But, why not just have the capital in, say, New Orleans? Much better music than in Iowa. Or, I heard about these new-fangled things called "aeroplanes". When these get more common, maybe Denver would be a better choice.

Hahahahahaha.